Tuesday, September 30, 2014

From A Scrap of Paper Found on the Floor (not my work)

...you must eliminate typos.  Do not write Matthew when you mean Mark, on a letter, even though the document is not set to mail merge, and is, hence, destined for failure (your fault).  We’ve lost faith in you, so we do most things ourselves.  This way they may not be completely right, but they will not be riddled by your simple errors, but our larger, unreported errors (i.e. they are not traceable).  You must not commit suicide. Who else would do your job, no matter how half-assed you are currently going about your tasks.  The great promise that you once had has proven to be a little promise. You thought you were destined for great things, but that is all over…too many starts and stops and falls and not very dramatic failures have brought you to this place riddled with typos, fault lines, and errors, the missteps of a man not destined for perfection, which is reserved for HaShem, Blessed Be His Name, but for a man without even the shadow of a wife, children, home, a place of space, and acres of silent woods and fields where he can cry and cry to G-d...

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