Servi’s room was too cold. He found the control for the air conditioner,
but it only turned on and off. So he
turned it off, but soon the room was stuffy, so Servi opened the door that led
out to a long balcony which ran along the length of the third floor. When he was fully outside, he thought he
smelled pot. He looked down at one of
the chaise lounges.
Beatrice was lying in what appeared to be a nightgown.
She was crying. Servi had on only
boxer shorts. He begged her pardon and
backed toward the door, but she called him back.
“I’m
sorry you have to see us like this,” she said in English. But unlike her earlier version of the
language, this attempt sounded discordant.
“I told him that you shouldn’t come here. That he can’t even help himself, how is he
gonna help you? But he said you were
like family. Him and family!” and she
started to cry again. Servi finally
noted the accent: it was pure Brooklyn. So curled up inside the Roman sophisticate
with her tailored blouses and her short, pressed skirts was little Beatrice
Grillo from Brooklyn by way of Oyster Bay.
“Let
me get a shirt on,” Servi said, taking a step back.
“No,
stay,” she said in Brooklynese. “You
wanna a hit of dis?” She held up a
joint. “I smoke it when I’m sad, to dull
the pain. But all it seems to do is make
me cry. Good thing is it makes me forget
why I am crying.” Servi took two hits and sat on the chair next
to her.
“Don’t
you see,” she started in again, and now Servi could see she was very stoned. “I
says to him we can hardly help ourselves.
We are falling apart at the seams.
How are we gonna help Aaron Servi?”
“I
don’t need help,” Servi said, feeling the pot now. “I’m a big boy now.”
“A
big boy,” she said in Italian, and stopped weeping. “No one is big Servi. Everyone is grown up on the outside but we’re
still children here,” she pointed to her breastbone. “We still cry ourselves to sleep when it is
dark, just like the smallest of children.”
Servi said nothing. She took a
deep drag of the joint and passed it to Servi.
He took another hit.
“Just
look at him! Look at him! A big baby with a bottle. He can’t face the fact that my mother is now
a part of this Tuscan soil, gone forever, so he makes his wine and drinks like
a peasant on market day. He’s like Noah
after the flood: he gets drunk in the
muck instead of facing facts that the world is dead as he knows it. Jesus Christ…” and she began to cry. Servi gently took her hand. She pulled him toward her and wept on his
naked shoulder.
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